Cleaning out our spare room closet has been a daunting task for years and one that I just keep putting off. It's full of all kinds of memories and really important things that are hard to let go, including lots and lots of photos, kids' drawings for the past 12 years, luggage, winter gear, photography equipment, holiday wrapping paper, a survival kit for when zombies take over—you name it, it's probably in there.
Embracing Procrastination
I've been putting off cleaning out that closet for years, and even more so in the last two years because it's where I stored a lot of Anthony's personal belongings.
In the last week, I finally hunkered down and started chipping away. I have wanted to do it for a long time, and now I am moving my home office into that room, so I am more or less held to the fire to get it done. I am known to work better under pressure and with deadlines...
I am not all the way done yet, it's probably going to take me a couple more weekends. I have a ton of files to go through, and I still need to work up the courage to go through Anthony's large storage container of his personal things. I want to place the most special and select items in a beautiful, smaller custom wood box I made in Anthony's memory.
Decluttering & Discovering
As I was going through old artwork and paperwork, I found a few things that brought me both tears and smiles. I found a thoughtful present that Anthony had handmade for our 26th birthday. This is about five years into his living in Flagstaff. He loved making puzzles, and this was more valuable than anything money could buy. It was hands down the best birthday gift, and I am so glad I still have it.
"Happy 26th, Meg. This represents the gateway to the rest of our lives. We have already done and learned so many things to be the people we are today, yet there is so much more to learn, accomplish, and experience in our lifetime. You have done so well, & I love you, Jessica, and Dad so much!!! (Just like Baylee's picture, this represents time and devotion, which are two of the things I will always have for you) Your Twin Brother, Anthony Thomas Meehan"
I am grateful he felt that way towards me and also extremely sad that he isn’t here to carry his promise out physically, but I know he will in spirit. I also found a disc full of photos from my Dad's camera from 2008, when my Dad and Anthony traveled together to Las Vegas. These are the forever memories I am so grateful to have.
A Little Bit Funny, A Little Bit Dappy
I also found a laughable Coronado High School "Explorer" newspaper article, with one guest column by yours truly and another by Anthony. Mine was a cynical recap of a recent senior house party busted by the cops. Pfffft, how dare they waste taxpayers' dollars and abuse their power against unlucky teens, ruuude! Kidding. They were doing their damn job, teenager Megan. I was definitely a bit of a rebel in my teen years... And Anthony's funny article about the justification of aliens eating humans for dinner because they are a superior race. And comparing it to his and my conversations about the reasons why I decided to be a vegetarian... wow, how times have changed!
I think the timing is right, though. It's been nearly two years since Anthony crossed over. Just last week, I finally got a call from Victim Witnesses Services that the driver who caused the accident was sentenced, and Anthony's case was closed. With other loose ends related to Anthony's legal matters finally wrapping up in recent months and the accident case closing almost two years later, I am finally able to close the chapter on the tragedy that seemed to be a constant. Now, I can forever focus on Anthony's memory and honor it in the way he wanted. Loving people for who they are and not what they are, giving back without any expectations, and avoiding putting materials and money first before the humans you love.
Miss you Brother <3
Love Your Twin Sister,
Megan
Comments